Tower Of Babel

Lemme tell you a story about a pretty funny night out. Back in the summer time, a group of us here in Ft. Lauderdale, FL were partying pretty hard each weekend. One Friday night, we were invited to a club called Santiago’s in Pembroke Pines for a birthday bash for one of the promoters.

Santiago’s is a Latin restaurant until Friday nights, when a group of Jamaican promoters put on a Jamaican party night. Lots of good Jamaican music, they have a pan chicken man outside - its a nice little vibe, still!

Anyway, this particular night we went to celebrate T-Man’s 42′nd birthday and the place was hopping as always. We were all drinking and partying and having a great old time. As the night went on, the crowd started to thin out a bit, but we were still hangin’. Midas (my hubby) and his buddy the Scotsman were sitting with one of the promoters while I stood at the bar chatting, and all of a sudden, I turned around to them to see this hot little Latin girl dancing on the bench beside them.

The suggestiveness of her moves increased as she went on, and the next thing I knew, she stepped in front of Mr. Cashmoney (the promoter) and began dancing - or as we say in Jamaica - wining - in front of him. Now get this picture - Mr. Cashmoney was sitting on the bench - she was standing in front of him, facing him, and wining in his face! Needless to say, she was drawing quite a crowd, as every man in the joint gathered around to watch Mr. Cashmoney get this surprise gift!

I initially decided that she must have been as high as the sky or something! Mr. Cashmoney wasn’t complaining, however! Anyway, as she went on and got more and more into it, I had a sudden brainwave. Here was this girl dancing away, having the time of her life by all appearances - what a great money-making opportunity. I started to charge the onlooking men $1 for a lap dance with my newest ‘talent’. Mr. Cashmoney gave me a dollar bill to start my kitty and away I went through the crowd of glazed-eyed men yelling “A dollar a dance!”

Soon enough, Midas, who had been sitting beside Mr. Cashmoney the entire time asked if he could pay for a lap dance. Being a fairly liberal-minded wife (read somewhat tipsy), I said “For you to get a lap dance, its $20!” He said okay and checked his cash - he only had a c-note ($100) so I said “No problem, I’ll go get change!” As he handed me the c-note, I pocketed it quickly and called to the talent act -her name was Lisa I later learned - “Dance with the man!”

So Midas got a lap dance (under my watchful eye, of course), his friend the Scotsman got a lapdance and a couple other guys there. Lisa was pretty cool - I later realised she probably really was a stripper though we’re still not sure (she says she does telemarketing!) She was pretty tipsy herself and just decided to spice up the party. For whatever reason, Lisa thought my idea was funny too and was happy to work with me that night.

Later on, she said to Midas and Mr. Cashmoney ” Midas has the coolest wife in the world - I can’t believe she let him get a lap dance!!!” Mr. Cashmoney laughed out loud. “Let him??? The man had to pay her $100 for it!” (I did mention that I pocketed the c-note right?)

Truthfully, it was all in good fun. I have no objection to my hubby getting a lapdance if its in good fun and if I’m there (Can I think of any other ‘if’s’?)

By the way, Midas did grab the c-note back from me when I wasn’t looking - so he got the dance for free!!! But all was not lost - I did make a buck or two!!! Although Lisa and I exchanged cards with plans to make money together again in the future, we haven’t been in touch since. But you never know… pimping can be addictive

This entry was posted on Monday, December 22nd, 2003 at 11:57 am and is filed under Funny. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.