Tower Of Babel

Hail up. I am sure that everyone’s mind is wondering…what the ….regarding the title here. Actually that is just me behaving badly (a rare occasion actually! )

Yesterday afternoon, having a bit of time on my hands because of cancellation of private practice (see previous post) I decided to pass the gas station as my left rear tyre had developed a ’slow leak’ over the last few days, resulting in my having to pass the air pump at a gas station almost every day to top up in order to avoid a flat. So I made a diagnosis that there must be some nail, bad valve or shyte accounting for this. Being a medic, I decided that it was time to confirm my diagnosis, and indeed come up with a prescription to have it cured.

Reached the station and chatted to the tyre man who indicated that as soon as the van on the ramp had left I could drive in. OK. Fifteen minutes later I drove in and the tyre was off. In a few seconds I saw the rounded silver head of a nail buried deeply into the rubber. Guy then pulls it out…he shows me and says…..”Ra$$, is one monster screw up pick up…almost six inches!” Anyway, it fix now. One of the rims also had a dent (mofoing potholes) which rude bwoy was happy to beat out straighten with a sledge hammer, so the ride does feel smoother now. Was out in another fifteen minutes.

Writing this I am now taken back to my days at UWI when I was doing my Natural Sciences degree. Had just got the shiny new red Lada, not even one week good and was driving on the Ring Road with a few friends to buy some patties for lunch down at Sugar and Spice in Liguanea. Suddenly, the steering jus never feel right. A bredrin looks out his window and confirms my suspicions….flat tyre! Anyway, jack the vehicle up. Take the flat off and get the spare out the trunk. Tighten up lugs and ting and when the jack is being lowered, a ffffft sound is being heard..(no, I wasn’t letting off no gas!)…by the time we look…spare nuh flat as well! So, the lunch trip had to be cancelled and a bredrin had to give me a lift to get two flats repaired. Only my luck, to have a new vehicle and in the first week you have it, have two flat tyres! Any of you ever get screwed like that before?

Today we have no clinic in the afternoon, cancelled because of the MB.BS finals. We have a few patients on our ward that will be used as exam cases. Hope the students do their stuff right…is not that they don’t get taught. Also need to call Rufie later to get the low down….find out if delivery is today or next week. Post sorta sterile…but is so it go sometime!You all stay safe you hear?

Well, I think my weekend can be summarised in all of two words….HOT (weatherwise that is, not in other ways that I know some of you gutter minded types might think…not that anything wrong with that type of heat!) and SPIRIT (of the liquid type). Yes, Friday night was good….the DJ at Peppers was a spin some nice 80s and 90s riddims that was a seh plenty when combined with the company and the VX. That with the heat of the night, made the alcohol disappear rather quickly. Got home late. Woke late Saturday morning to more heat. Boy, I doh know how we going manage when July-August reach. Is like we paying for sins committed from ages ago….the place is hot my people.

Saturday, I had a little peice o pork that I decided to try my hand at with Chinese Char Sui seasoning…that is the reddish Chinese style BBQ sauce. Well, it didn’t quite taste 100% like what you buy at the local Chiney restaurants, but for home cooked it was irie. It shall be done again in the future.

Saturday evening to early night, I ended up at Red Bones…not my favourite place at all. Actually, I don’t like it. Reasons? Well, I find it pretentious and it ra$$ expensive! So, you may be wondering why I would end up at a place that I don’t check fah…..Well….Jamdown Canadian’s (JC) son who is fifteen is in a little band, and they were playing ‘out’ for the first time, so I went along to give him and his teen crew some support…as well as to drink more spirit with JC (perhaps more of the latter than the former). Anyhow, they were to kick off at six…I reached ’bout ten minutes after six and they were just finishing their first song. Cover charge…$300 which I paid to support the band….not Red Bones. As I reach I join JC at the bar, he is on his first VX, the bar is just to the left of the stage. We decide to get a ‘Q’ of VX….works out cheaper that way than paying for single shots of rum. Bartenda tells us is $650 for a Q…well, it kinda more expensive than what we are accustomed to paying elsewhere, but we can work wid it. He comes back two minutes later….’Sorry Sir….is $650 for a Q of the Appleton Special, a Q of VX is $800!’ That smiley represents JC and I looking at each other. So, JC says to him, “Ra$$ my yute, dats what a Litre of the stuff costs at the supermarket!” Now, I would have thought he would be a bit apologetic and try to pass it off. Is not his fault that the place not cheap….no, his response….”Umm, this is Red Bones Sir!” We went along wid it, but closed the bill immediately that we finished the Q…about an hour later. By then the band was wrapping up anyhow. All in all, the yute dem sounding good. The lead singer in particular have good potential.

Well, we left there at about 9:15 and both JC and I were feeling a bit raw (hungry) and were not going to tek on dem inflated food prices there….and in the need for a bit more spirit. Hear what…leave over curry chicken inna de fridge and the lika at my bar is paid for…so you done know where we ended up killing the night. As dem seh…no weh nuh betta dan yard! Two day old curry chicken was irie after blasting it in the microwave. Parted company at about 11:30 PM.

Sunday…am awakened a bit earlier than planned at 7:15 AM by the phone. Bad news….remember JC’s cousin whose funeral I went to about a month back….had committed suicide? Well, the Pops died in hospital Sunday. I wasn’t surprised still, long story but his overall condition was pretty poor. I think Uncle Lates better off. I hear he been in a slightly confused state and saying him want to know why him son did this to himself and ting….succumbed to a pneumonia and other complications. Well, maybe he can get to rap with him now. Hope he will RIP.

Was roped into another family gathering at the home last nite, help the family deal with the passing, though it was kinda expected….more spirit again. But I went slowly. The heat however was scorching.

Spoke to Rufie as well yesterday. They had shower for her Sunday. Appears to have went well. Her Doc supposed to be checking on baby’s lung maturity Tuesday (would have been today but is holiday in States today), if lungs mature enough, induction tomorrow. If not, they waiting one more week and then deliver! I hope all goes well for my sister and Bro-In-Law. Will bring some nice vibes into the family. I guess in the midst of death there is also life.

Well, I not in the work mood today at all. I had no idea seh dis friggery was a gwaan. Now, I do private practice in two places that require me to drive the Mountain View route. Hear what? Today is being cancelled stat. My life nuh worth it. I may not have any wife or pickney, but I have family and bredrins that love me, and I love mislef, and despite what a gwaan life sweet. So, my work day has been suddenly shortened. The little extra income can always be made up another time. Poor us. I not lamenting on this issue anymore…been there and done that too often here.

I have to big up mi bredrin Mad Bull for posting about Miss Universe….I never know it was a gwaan tomorrow at all. So, I guess there is suppem to watch tomorrow nite….what time rude bwoy? Check out the pics of the ladies he has posted…they have on clothes btw, no need to fret that is any skin up pictures! Costa Rica looking verry noice if you ask me.

That’s about it from me for now. Happy Memorial Day to those like Sunshine and Angry Dawg who inna States. That however, does not excuse you from posting and commenting! Awoah! In fact, it gives you more time to blog. Tek it easy.

…no, I am not sharing any joke I received via the net. This one is the headline from the Observer which made me smile while having my cuppa tea this morning. See what prisoners demanding to be given to eat! Black Forest cake and cranberry juice to rahtid! I wonder which doctor made these dietary suggestions? Somehow ackee and saltfish and black forest cake don’t make up part of a diabetic diet…but then again…who am I? Just a Dermatologist, right? Stay deh. I do have to make dietary suggestions for patients when we admit them….I don’t necessarily write a ‘menu’…but I would not be too happy to see black forest cake coming from the kitchen for a diabetic…lest it be sugar free. As for cranberry juice….I have noted here in recent times that it has become a popular chaser especially with vodka drinkers….I wonder if is liquor dem want to chase with the cranberry inna lockup? Seems dem feel dat dem at dem yard. Black Forest cake….been a long time I haven’t had any…maybe I should get me some. Anyway, I found the headline quite a good laugh to start the Friday morning.

That story reminds me of last week. We on our ward round. Have a male pateint in his late thirties who we admitted. Have Sickle Cell disease with a chronic leg ulcer which we grafted for him. Could barely walk good when we admitted him because of pain in the ulcer. Graft healing nicely….just waiting for a few more days of healing before we discharge him….apart from that, he should be kriss…unless some new problem pop up that we are unaware of. We reach him bed…face well sour. We ask how he is….”Not good!” We enquire what the problem is. We note that his breakfast….some nice whole wheat bread with saltfish and cabbage is covered up in front of him not touched. “De kitchen cyaan cook food to suit me! So, I not eating it. I doh eat bread and dem send bread wid mi breakfast. I doh like cabbage! And I tell dem I doh eat tinned food, pork or beef and last night is beef stew dem send for mi dinner……” Of course, I lose interest long time.

Look, the hospital is not a hotel. Is a place fe sick people. I am not saying the kitchen is perfect, but they do try, and they are a lot better than previously. That breakfast of saltfish and cabbage was better than what I had at mi yard the same morning. I have seen cases where the patient complains about a meal, they return it and when the replacement meal comes the patient seh dem not eating it cause it cold, or dem lose dem appetite.

My take on this…whenever the patient’s main complaints are non-medical, solely about food..is time for discharge. When people really sick, they scarcely even want to eat. In addition to that….ask if plenty of dem who complaining about the food have the first dollar to pay towards their hospital bill. In addition, there are some patients who not getting three meals a day with in between snacks at dem house…nuff o dem gain weight in hospital as they are being better fed.

Any of you ever been in hospital? What was your take on the food? I won’t enquire if you ever been in lockup. You can keep dat unda wraps. Anyhow, this talk about food is getting me hungry….I wonder what fare I can rustle up? I know for sure no cranberry juice deh yah! Sorry ’bout the trivial nature of the post again, but a so life go sometime. TGIF people.

Well, I’m going to say a few words here, and don’t feel I’m bashing any of you in particular, I’m not…some of you I don’t even know. But here goes anyhow. I think one of the characters about myself that I take pride in is that I am a reliable individual. If I say I will do something, you bet it will be done. This is even more so if the matter has to do with my work, or a need of someone in my family or close friends. Now, much as this may be a quality that I think is admirable, people can take advantage of it, and USE me….of course, that is simply if I allow it.

When people who I haven’t heard from in moons suddenly call, (often times when I’m at home chilling) and they sound all nice on the other end of the line, I know they not calling to seh, “Whappen, you cool?” No, that is usually just them trying to make it seem that they give a shit. They want a favour. Quite often at short notice. Short notice sometimes results in one having to stress out yourself in order to grant the favour……dem need a recommendation…when for…well…the deadline is tomorrow….but I only just remembered….. My impression of these types of last miunters is that they are highly disorganised, and I can’t work with them. Plus, me nuh like people use me. Someone who would probably never call suddenly remembers that I can legally sign a prescription……’Hi….I was wondering if you could call in a…..” Indeed, I do have folks that I will do that sort of thing for, not all and sundry, sorry. The people who I will do that sort of stuff for know who they are. Is not that I expecting anything in return, but, a bredrin doh have a problem buying me a VX, my family does plenty for me and vice versa…you get me? All de likkle free loader dem might not even remember that I exist ’till another year passes and all of a sudden they need a favour again at short notice.

I don’t quite finish yet…and please don’t think I’m some chronic complainer. Let me give you a word of advice….rely on yourself….do not expect others to come through for you….people are notorious for giving plenty lip service….”Yeah man, it will be ready tomorrow morning.” You check back….”Rahtid, you know I forget?”

I don’t have a very large ’support group’ availabe to me and as a result, I have to do almost everything that needs to be ‘done’ myself. Of course, there are times that one can become overwhelmed, and when that happens I need to prioritise….Ok, what can be slashed from the list to be done today that can wait? You know ’bout?

Anyway, I’m going to end this little discourse by saying, if you commit to something, give it your all. If you don’t consider yourself a doer, then don’t promise to do….it is not nice to be let down. Try not to use people, it is not a good habit to get into. Be willing to offer a hand to those who you hold near and dear to your heart….immediate family…bredrins/sistrens…life would be anaemic without the love that we get from them. Last of all, do not rely on others, rely on yourself.

On a different note, with the heavy rains we have been having (last night no different) we have had an explosion in the mosquito population. I tell you, as I sit here I have been waging an all out war with the annoying beasts with my little tennis racquet shaped electric swatter which fries them. I guess I just have to live with it. No rain meant the place looked dry and barren. Nuff rain means the place is lush and green with plenty mosquito. Whatever. Sorry about the trivial nature of the post…but occasionally the mind does run a bit. Feel free to comment and add any little bits of advice you may have. A good day to all.

Well, as the Brits would say…..I’m in a RIGHT mood this evening…(and I don’t consider myself a moody person). Now, if you read the post I did this morning, I made mention that today, being the 24th of the month, is Lodgement Day, as Payday is tomorrow. Well, that is how it is supposed to be… So, if things were as they were supposed to be, by now, my salary should have been credited directly to my current account……well, I have a short tale to tell.

This evening, on my way home, the cell rings. It is a colleague. She is on the ward completing an admission. “D….did you see the memo?” I reply….”Memo?? From whom…..” She responds, “The memo from Accounts, dated TODAY, which states that we will NOT be paid tomorrow on account of non-receipt of funding!!!”

Of course, I start to get brindle, as I never signed any contract to do voluntary work….much as I would love to have enough money that I could practice medicine in a purely voluntary situation and help the less fortunate. Yow, man have financial responsibilities yuh nuh! She goes on to tell me that people have called Accounts enquiring as to WHEN they will be paying and the reply is that THEY DO NOT KNOW!!! Nuh bodda wid me yaw!

Well, I can tell you. I have already called my boss and informed her that if they do not pay by month end…don’t look fe me come June 1. Clearly, the shyte lick rock bottom now, and this is simply an indication that is time to move on to other options. I can’t work in a situation where I have to wonder if I will get paid….too damn uncertain…that cyaan carry go give the mortgage company…and it won’t get you any groceries at Sovereign, you simi!? Mark you, since I started working where I am almost ten years ago, this is the first this has ever happened, but, its no sceret, the government bruck…(or at least dem only have money fe do wah dem want.)

Anyway, let us hope this is resolved pretty damn quick…or onoo might see me writing a blog post entitled…”Beg you a money!” (See how me have to tek serious business and a mek joke.) I might as well go drink a VX on mi patio…at least dat pay fah already!

Well, the likkle hoilday was well appreciated yesterday. The rainy weather definitely seems to have moved on as it is sunny this morning. However, with the way things have been going, I would not be surprised if we have a wet afternoon later when, as the weather people would say….’daytime heating’ comes into play, making the humidity rise.

Anyway, it is back to the grind this morning. I scanned the newspapers and will highlight just a few articles that caught my attention. Remember that the PSOJ is planning to shut down businessplaces tomorrow as a means of protesting against the crime levels here? Suppem that I said in a previous post, amounted to nutten but a whole heap of flatulence IMHO? Well, I see I am not the only one who feels so. Read this letter to the Editor of the Gleaner. I wonder if the banks will be closing tomorrow as well? I ask as it is payday tomorrow..then again, that means the funds should be credited to our accounts today!

Now, the next article that made me cuss two dutty claat while I was having mi cuppa Earl Grey is this one! More for light, AGAIN!? WTF dem expect from people doh eeh? There is just no way for a man to escape the crap….seems to me that the more me try earn de likkle bread, some shyte comes along to eat it. What to do…..me nuh know. Seems to me some serious conservation efforts need to come into play…though I doubt that it will reflect in the bloody bill.

Anything else a gwaan? Well, I walked yesterday in the evening…and I would like to repeat the performance later today as well. I also need to get a haircut…went Saturday to be informed that my barber went foreign for two weeks….expected back this week. I will shout them later to see if he has returned. Apart from that, things seem much as per usual, but, why complain, that is the nature of life. Up one day, down the next…routine for another two. Anything worthy of mention inna your corners? More time.

Hi all. I have an irie little mind bender for you… According to the guy who showed it to me, its used by the Chinese (or did he say the Japanese). Whenever you go for a job interview at a Chinese company (or Japanese, if I made a mistake), the employers give the potential employees this little test. If the potential recruit can’t solve this puzzle in 30 minutes or less, they don’t get the job! Would you like to check it out? Well, go to this page. The game will appear shortly, give it a couple of seconds to load. The rules are shown below the window which the starting screen of the game appears in. Click the big round blue button with the Chinese (or Japanese) in it to start the game. I include below the rules of the game…

Rules of the game

You have to get all of the characters from the left bank of the river to the right hand side bank of the river. There is a woman with 2 daughters, a man with 2 sons, a prisoner and a police officer.

To reach your goal, you have to use the raft. The raft can carry one or two persons and can only be steered by the man, the woman or the police officer.

There are some restrictions:
The little girls can not be left alone with the man… (must be a little rapist, huh).
The little boys can’t be left alone with the woman… (She sounds abnormal too).
The prisoner cannot be left alone with anyone that’s not the police officer.
To start the game, press the round blue button on the right.
Click the little red button thats beside beside the raft to get it moving.

Do be truthful about how long it takes you to figure it out. Oh, and since I anticipate that some of you may ask yourself “Can this game really be solved?”, yes it can… I solved it myself, in just under 30 minutes. Here is the proof… see, everyone is on the righthand bank in the picture below.

Good luck!

Well, apologies for not posting on the weekend. Saturday between taking call, not having much to share and being a bit tired, I was up to nutten. Yesterday, I actually came by here to write a likkle suppem, but no sooner than I had logged een, the phone rang…a friend calling from foreign. Chatted for about fifteen minutes, by that time, the sky was looking even more dark than before and lightening was a lick…..Lightening and computers don’t tek tea, as I learned the hard way already…so, lock down dis rass…..did not want nutten to get fried, you si mi!? The rains continued until quite late last night and I eventually turned in.

This morning it is a bit overcast, the place is very quiet, can’t hear one car engine, the sun is peeking through the clouds and the birds of the air are having a whistling contest…beautiful. They are probably celebrating with all of us who greet the holiday….Labour Day, today. I was awakened by the telephone at 7:20 AM….I thought it was the hospital a call….see, right now I am watching the clock, as at 0800 hours, I officially am off call, that’s in four minutos! It was actually a bredrin calling still….he was most apologetic. I told him jus cool….whappen? Seems him nyam suppem yesterday (he thinks its lychee) and him lips all swollen this morning…his speech did sound funny. Anyway, he had some Benadryl capsules at home…told him to swallow two and I would call him back in a while, see if I need to give him a check and write a script.

Actually, the plan is that I waan drive out to Buff Bay today, nyam some Jerk Pork and drink two Stripe at Blueberry Hill while inhaling some sea breeze. Jus hope the rains don’t decide to fall today, and frig up that plan…. Right now, I am all for going. If the weather remains as it is now, everyting shoulda kriss.

Rufie was discharged from hospital Friday evening. We chatted yesterday and she sounds fine. In another two to three weeks she will be induced, Dr. D, should become an official Uncle, God’s willing. Looking forward to that. According to the Ultrasounds, it is a girl. I mentioned this to someone I know…..she was glad to hear it was a girl….so I asked why so? “Girls are so much more focussed….boys tend to be a bit wayward….” (She has one of each). I tended to disagree with her….but eventually we ended by saying, whatever the gender, as long as its a normal pickeny….we will all be cool.

Anyhow, is now after eight, so call done! Let me leave by saying to those of you involved in Labour Day projects….good luck wid it. To those of you slaving away at work….hush! Lataz.

What kind of guy are you?

Do you think you’re more the gutsy type or do you think you have balls of steel? Hard to decide, huh? I guess it would be helpful if you knew what the difference was between “guts” and “balls”? Well look below:

Guts - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you going flying somewhere?”

Balls - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, “You’re next.”

So, which kind of guy are you?

Thank God for that. Blogwise, it has been a week where I haven’t had much to write. Perhaps a combination of tiredness and other things. I really haven’t been looking around for stories on which to share my own thoughts. I did prips the Gleaner this morning tho….I see where the Private Sector Organization of Jamaica (PSOJ) is planning to shut down their businesses next week Wednesday as a means of protesting against the high murder rate here. They are also asking motorists to drive with their headlights on…. My response to that…fine, if you want to. I not turning on my headlights. Call me cynical, say I’m not a ‘team player’, but I doh defend this sorta ting. I’ve said it here long time, the heap a ‘bawl outs’, prayer breakfasts etc. not changing crime levels. The people who get involved in these activities are not the ones who doing the evil deeds. They (the wrongdoers) doh give a fart if private business people waan lock down their places of business next Wednesday. In fact, the criminals knowing this fact may just take advantage of it….everywhere lock up….mek we go bruck een and tief dem ra$$. So, they will sacrifice a business day (bear in mind Monday is already a Public Holiday), in the hope that this will reduce crime. Perhaps I should be less negative in my approach and say, good luck. We will see what comes out of it.

On a more personal note, my sister Rufie was not released from hospital. She is still being monitored. I can’t say I blame the doctor caring for her. At 39 years old, this is the first pregnancy she has carried so far, we don’t need to take any chances….she is high risk. Let her stay and rest where she is until you are satisfied that everyting kriss. I just hope she does not go into labour until another few weeks pass, the baby could use another two or three weeks of maturity. Join me in my prayers for her, Marc Antony and the wee one.

Well, I have to teach today…yeah, the likkle one week break from medical students done. Anyway, I’m looking forward to this evening for the usual. Monday is a holiday (I think I mentioned that already)…Labour Day. I don’t plan on any labouring though. I will be on call tomorrow and Sunday. I plan to hold some R&R. Anybody who have issues with that, well you can do your next best…. (man fulla attitude eh!? ) You all have a good Friday and weekend. To those of you who have work on Monday….I say, never mind…I really won’t be thinking of you while you’re hard at it (I not calling nuh name…but some blogger dem get holiday even to go vote…so…payback time!) TGIF my crew.