Monday….at yard.
What a gwaan people? Well, sometime between late Saturday night and early Sunday morning, the rumbling started, followed by nuff releases of the gaseous kind. Then, I found myself having to seek out that place of safety called the toilet seat with increasing frequency. Soon, the medic in me diagnosed that I was having a case of intestinal hurry…AKA….diarrhoea…..AKA…the shits! 
After many episodes in the wee hours of Sunday morning I embarked on a search of the medicine cabinet which sits above the throne. Unfortunately this search proved futile, it yielded no booty of antidiarrhoeals! 
Luckily, by this time my bowels had been more or less depleted of just about everything, so I was able to get some sleep.
By about 6AM on Sunday morning, I am awakened by the urge to take part in the relay again, but am pretty unsure if what is to come is gas or liquid, so rather than shart up de place, I play it safe and off to home base I go again with baton in hand…..muttering to myself that it is time to put an end to this crap (literally).
I then remember that I am on call…..yes, its my responsibility to go do the ward round. I notice that getting up from the seated position, my joints and muscles in my lower limbs now ache me and I really don’t feel too great. Some viral thing has got me by the bowels to rahtid!
I went back to bed and found myself oversleeping. Eventually I mustered up enough energy to do the round at the hospital and on the way back home got me some Imodium (Loperamide), a 2 Litre bottle of coconut water and some ginger beer to soothe my belly. By evening, the Imodium had tripped in and the olympic relay between the bowl and bed had more or less come to an end. Watched TV ’till well after 2 AM this morning as I could not sleep on account of the heap of rest I got during the day. Nuff things did watch…..Discovery, Cold Case Files, American Justice, Sopranos…a movie on HBO…(name not recalled)….some porn…..a bit boring so didn’t linger too long, etc etc.
Even though the diarrhoea was no longer an issue, I was still pained up despite Panadol. Woke up this morning, moving was still painful and I think I may have had a slight fever. So, I called my boss at about 7:30 AM to tell her not to look for me today.
Long and short of it is that the furthest I have been from morning is to the gate to take off the padlock. I havent entered the car. I have been sleeping, watching more TV, and slowly regaining my usual self. Happy to report that my appetite is back and I think I shall go to work tomorrow. I rarely miss work on account of feeling unwell…..and it is usually never more than a day or two at max.
I had started a blog post earlier today but I didn’t like how it was sounding, so I deleted it to rahtid. Anyway, not a hell of a lot to report otherwise. I’m glad that I seem to have shaken this wretched gastrointestinal malady. If however, I post again tomorrow, and the post is titled, “Tuesday….at yard”, you done know seh more shyte a gwaan! (Let me not goat mout miself.) More time.
May 15th, 2006 at 8:24 pm Lol,well for your sake I hope it’s not Tuesday at yard.Feel better soon
May 15th, 2006 at 9:19 pm Hush…yuh can keep that shyte to yourself
May 15th, 2006 at 9:25 pm Hope you feel much better tommorow doc.
May 16th, 2006 at 2:09 am Seems you had a “shitty” weekend! Hope you will be back to normal soon.
May 16th, 2006 at 6:16 am hope you feel better now cause at the rate you say ya did running gatlin record like it was in trouble
May 16th, 2006 at 7:17 am Get better quickly…
May 16th, 2006 at 9:31 am Take care of yourself man.
May 16th, 2006 at 1:26 pm Just got back from the exam. I’ll blog about it later. My goodness. I definitely can relate! BIG TIME!!!I had a similar experience while with family in a hotel at Ocho Rios just after stopping at Faith’s Pen for some Jerk Pork. It was during that fateful hour in the early morning, close to 3 am when hell and powder house exploded in my belly. Ran to the bathroom, only to see I had to wait because it was already occupied with family victims too! Lawd…de whole a wi nearly pop dung di tilet! It was bunged up repeatedly. I had to get some Immodium too. I had taken about 3 pills for each dose, because one wasnt doing its job. When I still didnt feel it working, we had to run (hmmph!) down to the gas station to see if had Pepto Bismol. I tried that, and it stopped. But, that wasnt the worst part. I went 6 WHOLE DAYS without going to the bathroom. I’m sure I broke many world records there. My entire system stopped. I became the bottomless pit, because whatever went in never came back out at all. Damn! Pepto Bismol is some strong stuff. I hope you’ll get better real quickly though. Just be glad it isnt gas. That’s even much worse. Waking up with pains in the middle of the night. Jeez, I need to start eating better. I love American Justice on A&E too. My Discovery Channel is gone, ever since my cable company decided it didnt want me to discover animal porn anymore and confiscated it from me. Are you at work today? If you’re still sick, take some Pepto Bismol. But only a microscopic amount.
May 17th, 2006 at 8:56 am Kash…you ODed dude! The dose of Immodium is 2 tabs stat and then 1 tablet tds (three times daily) if needed. I took a total of four in all and things were cool after that. I’m not a Pepto fan at all….I hate how it tastes. But, I suppose when shit hol a man anything to mek it stop is welcome!
May 17th, 2006 at 1:57 pm Memoirs of a shitster!
May 17th, 2006 at 2:45 pm Hush bro. I had a bout of it recently so bad that it made me vomit violently.
May 17th, 2006 at 3:57 pm Doc: Glad you’re feeling better. I know of what you speak. One of the first things I put in my luggage when I’m packing for home is Imodium, tablets and liquid. I’ve been away too long so my system is sensitive to the water and certain foods. I shy away from buying cooked food at roadside, here in NY as well as Jamaica. Last time I bought a NY street hot dog I was sick as a dog.