The Mad Bull's Blog

October 10, 2005

Its About Nothing at all

Check this spider out! It was about the size of my palm, people! Cayman seems to be spider country, trust me! Its not the first spider that I have seen in that size range!

That spider was chilling on the rails of the little verandah (I guess thats what you'd call it) of the house I live in. Natty deemed that it was too close to the house for comfort, and so the spider is no more... Actually, I didn't mind committing murder with this spider, because I had visions of it getting into the house and having chilluns and then the whole house would have become inundated with them, (and then maybe Natty would have "lacked shap" until I got rid of the li'l bastards), but you know what I mean!

Anyway, let me come off of that topic before oonoo change my blogname from "The Mad Bull's Blog" to "The Spider Murderer's Blog".

Lets talk about chickens for a little bit: Now, if you cast your minds back to just after Ivan, you will recall that I used to mention chickens a lot!

Yes Rasta, at the time, the A/C was given a vacation and so one had to sleep with the windows open. Of course, the roosters in the open lot next door decided that this was their time to shine, and as a result, they got featured on my blog! Plenty! Never mind that they were considered 'gallus non grata', once their name was called, they figured that fame (or infamy) was not far behind!

Trust me, rasta, many a time those cockerels had me cursing plenty badwords before they crowed thrice!

Anyway, since we have had the light turned back on, I no longer sleep with the windows open. No sir, its A/C or fan for me nightly, and with the windows closed, you hardly remember that those chickens are out there. This never fit into their plans at all!

As a matter of fact, I am sure the roosters felt slighted by my ignoring them! Slighted is probably to weak a word! They felt DISS-respected! They demanded satisfaction! So it was that the Northward roosters banded together and decided to pay good moneh (ah so money pronounce in Cayman.. in fact, any word ending in "ey" is pronounced as though it ended in "eh" ie. "Mah babeh daddeh doh gi me di babeh moneh yet.") to have a certain mercenary brown rooster from Beach Bay assassinate the Mad Bull....

People, this afternoon, I picked up MBJr. from school and took him around to a bredrin's house around Beach Bay! When I left and was retracing my steps, as I drove along Beach Bay Road towards Shamrock Road, out of the corner of my eye I saw the dastardly brown rooster launch his cowardly attack! He lay in waiting in a dense thicket on a 'grassy knoll' on one of the open lots along that road, and as I was driving past, he burst from cover and tore across the road at breakneck speed, aiming to throw himself under my fast spinning wheels! That dirty hen-fucker knew that I would try to throw myself out of the way, sacrificing myself so as not to crush him! It was only God above that saved me! Yeah, I know I haven't been to church recently, but the good Lord above still found that I was worth saving, or maybe he was loth to lose yet another Christian (however poor an example) to that hen-pecking, heathen bunch of avian assholes. Whatever the reason for it, my life was spared. The rooster lived to see another day as well, which is a pity, because I am sure he will try to kill me again.... chicken are determined little fassey-holes, you know! You know, I really ought to beef up my security detail! All my blog readers who want to ensure my longevity, feel free to send moneh to account 0220112345001 at Cayman National, yuh simi? Its for a good couse... the best in fact!

So, oonoo was wondering what I did with the rest of my weekend, especially after I went to Corner Pocket to chill with the Troublesome one and Ri (pronounced "Rhee", awoah!). Well, if you are interested, go here to read up on my Saturday nite! Trouble, rest assured, I had fun, fun, fun!

On Sunday, Trouble went back to Corner Pocket! I wished he had mentioned he was going, because I'd have passed thru...My Sunday was going quite nicely too, but then I got called out to work at about 7:30, and I was there at work until 1:30a.m.! The same thing happened the weekend before too... hmph! It had better not become a trend, thats all I'm saying!

Anyway, I-an-I gone. Chat to you later...

Posted by Mad Bull at October 10, 2005 11:16 PM

Comments

Murderer,
blood is on yuh sholder,
kill spida today yuh nah go kill him tomorrow

Yow da spida deh big rasta! Mi woulda tek him out too myself! Dem things belong in di bushes.

Hey I always notice how chickens see a car coming, run out of the way and then run right back into the pathe of the vehicle! Anybody call mi chicken mi wi tek offence!

Hey mad bull di you get to see the pic of the sunset I took in Cayman?

Posted by: stunner on October 11, 2005 06:05 AM

Hey MB I've got a whole parcel of gallus non grata, or should that be galli non grata? Anyway, wanna come over here and run them over for me?

Posted by: dorna! on October 11, 2005 08:40 AM

Since yuh in the killing mood, we have some........

Posted by: scratchie on October 11, 2005 09:09 AM

Arachnophobia!

Seems dem chickens there rule you life!

Posted by: Dr. D. on October 11, 2005 09:14 AM

Tsk tsk tsk tsk.

Tsk tsk tsk.

You killed an ordinary, likkle BEENIE LIKKLE spider.

Tsk tsk tsk.

Posted by: guyana-gyal on October 11, 2005 11:07 AM

Hi Mad Bull-Dat is one ratid big spider. What is that underneath the body?

Posted by: sunshine on October 11, 2005 11:38 AM

How they have fowl running around causing so much trouble in Cayman. I think they need to open up more KFC round there...

Posted by: Marc on October 11, 2005 06:45 PM

Not too long ago sheep ruled the road here.And they used to take their own sweet time crossing

Posted by: Kami on October 11, 2005 09:25 PM

Sounds like you're having 'Operation Kingfish' or 'Shock and Awe' out ther with them chickens???????? Waddup???
I love the 'babeh dadeh' bit - made me laugh right out loud! Have you guys tried to read that bit out loud - kinda sounds like a sing song accent dunnit?

Posted by: 7 on October 11, 2005 10:58 PM

Go deh my Bull, clean up the spidah's dem. One has to do what one has to do to make oneself a hero in the mind of one's spouse.. oh what we do apart from the obvious. Killin all God creecha dem. Fyah an Brimstone.. well jus kiddin.

Posted by: Revolution Island on October 12, 2005 09:40 AM

Rass, if it was me with that rooster, Natty and MBjr would be eating chicken roadkill all weekend long!

Posted by: AngryDog on October 12, 2005 12:29 PM

murderer! you killed one of god's creatures!

the only things that should be killed are roaches and rats/mice. Actually those arent god's creatures, those are from the devil himself.

Posted by: Yamfoot on October 12, 2005 07:43 PM

Stap write blag and go empty your toroloco mailbox - it fill up!

Posted by: 7 on October 12, 2005 09:56 PM

boy do you have an exciting life.

Posted by: Amelia on October 12, 2005 10:33 PM

Weird coincidence, by the way, my brother's friend turns up and we have a long discussion about spiders!!!

Posted by: guyana-gyal on October 13, 2005 11:52 AM