The Mad Bull’s Blog, Version 3

Even laziness can give rise to humour! This evening, I was a bit tired, what with returning to the real world of menial, back breaking labour, and so when Dr. D dropped by for a drink, I got out one of those big plastic cups and mixed each of us a “serve-me-long”.

When I handed it to him, he raised his eyebrows, immediately rested it on a table nearby and reached into his pocket for a $20 coin. I said “Whats that for?”, and he replied “Isn’t it $20 more when you supersize it?“.

I had asked Jamie to give me the “Five question” routine, and she shot me five humdingers. I attempt to do justice to her questions below.

1. If you won the lottery, how would you handle the winnings and what would be the first thing you’d do with the money?

Well, that really depends on how much I win. If I were to win a decent amount, (say US$2,000,000 or so) I’d purchase a house for Natty and I in an upscale neighbourhood. I’d also purchase a house for Natty’s Mom and Dad, and a house for my Mom. Next, I’d set up some kind of business for myself, and I’d invest the money in a fairly conservative portfolio of stocks… The aim here would be to maintain the money I have rather than to take on MUCHO risk in a bid to get all-out, stinking rich… yeah, I’m somewhat risk-averse when it comes to money!

2. If you were elected into office in your country, what would be the first issue you’d address to change and why?

Wow! I gave this issue a lot of thought! This question is probably the reason why I took so long to get around to answering your questions, Jamie, no, I wasn’t sitting around jerking off like you thought…
This question is a humdinger! Anyway, after much consideration, I must say that I have STILL not come to a conclusion on this! No money nuh deh deh! (There is NO money!) How would I tackle anything?

Health is a mess! Manufacturing is almost non-existent! Education is in the doldrums! That battyhole (asshole) bin Laden and his cronies have almost put paid to tourism and to the Airlines. Everything is fucked!

Hear what, I think I’m going to leave this question alone! I will leave it to some braver, more intelligent men than I! I DO reserve the right to heckle and cuss their RASSES for any mistakes they make though. Hell, thats the Jamaican way! Check out Mutty! Thats how we roll, baby!

3. Where is the craziest place you’ve “done it”?

Bwoy, Jamie, let me say that Natty doesn’t like it when I field questionss like this. I can hear her now! “What you telling everybody your business for?!
As a result, I won’t get too deep into this one. When I was in my teens, the Gov’t. of the day was constructing a fire station near to the Stony Hill Square. For whatever reason, work on the building stalled for a number of years, and the lot of land became a bit overgrown, and the building stood uncompleted. It had no doors and the windows were simply gaping holes opening unto the bushy lot, and to the neighbour’s houses. Into this building did the Mad Bull take a girl and there they did the nasty! Lets move on…

4. Do you have a recurring fantasy? Describe the fantasy?

This one is also hard, because I have a number of fantasies, and many of them are recurring. I guess the one that recurrs the most involves making it with two women, but then they say that every man dreams of that.

5. How has fatherhood changed you?

Well, I have diverted some of my focus away from things of an I/T nature and toward MBJr. and not ONE FUCK ELSE! ( the last 5 words were Natty’s )

Now I’m supposed to say that whoever wants me to ask them five questions can leave me a comment saying so, but shit, everybody has been doing this, its getting old! As a consequence, I will not be taking any requests for questions! And if you have drawn the conclusion that the “serve-me-long” has bowled my wicket, FUCK YOU! (you’d be right No wonder that dude Damien called me crass!)

Tags: Entertaining Stuff //